Back on the Breathing Tube

Farrah got to meet her other grandma on Thursday. My mom came to town and was so excited to meet Farrah. It worked out that I got to hold her that first day, so my mom got to spend time with her up close. I regret that we did not get any photos of the three generations of women, but there is more time for that later.

On Monday, as we were parking our car in the hospital garage we found out that Farrah needed to be re-intubated because there were multiple signs that she was getting too tired. We knew that she was needing more and more support but kept hoping that she would be able to keep the nasal cannula in. The final sign was a chest xray that made her doctor write the order for the vent or breathing tube. We couldn't argue with a chest xray, and preemies end up going backwards when they get really tired. Ray and I had a little trouble accepting the step back, and we had figured that Farrah would not go back on the breathing tube because it had been more than a week that she had been off of it. Farrah's nurses tell us that this step back is common for preemies, and it should only be a matter of another week or two before they will try the ram cannula again. Hopefully by that time, she will be bigger and stronger. There will be a day when she no longer needs a breathing tube, but it feels so far away right now. Since she has been back on the breathing tube, she has appeared way more relaxed than she was during the past week. We want her to be comfortable as she continues to fight her way home to us.

I don't think I have mentioned yet that while Farrah did not have the breathing tube in, we heard noises coming from her for the first time since her delivery. The noises included soft cries and little squeaks and squeals. Some of the noises were just typical baby noises that a newborn might make. It was music to our ears! It happened a lot during the times when we were holding her. What we dislike the most about her having the breathing tube back in is that we cannot hear her for now. Apparently, Farrah did not like it when they put the tube back in and immediately was tugging on it. She is still her feisty little self and we were told that Farrah has had significant weight gain in the past week. She was up to 2.5 pounds at one point, but some of it appeared to be edema. She received lasix and has gone down to 2 pounds again. We want her to gain weight, but not when it is only extra fluid. One change that her doctor made is that extra calories are being added to the breast milk she gets through her feeding tube in the hopes that she will start growing more steadily and faster. Her feedings have increased to 14 ccs every three hours, and she has been tolerating her feedings well even with going back on the breathing tube. She is peeing and pooping as she should be, which we are thankful for. She has grown one inch in length since birth (now 14 1/2 inches). She is way more alert now during the times when the nurses or we change her diaper, take her temperature, and move her to a different position.

Farrah is doing well, but she is not out of the woods yet. We would appreciate your continued good thoughts and prayers for her. There are a lot of things that could complicate her course and we pray every day that she would not have to deal with any of those things. We attended a support group for parents of babies in the same NICU, and we were surprised to learn that Farrah was one of the larger babies of the group. The majority of the women delivered at 24 or 25 weeks, and their babies weighed less than 1 pound, 5 ounces when they were delivered. We praise God that we were able to get an extra 3 weeks for Farrah to grow inside of me. When a baby is delivered at 28 weeks, their odds of survival go up to 95%. When they are delivered at 23 weeks, they have 50% odds. It was helpful to talk to other parents who are dealing with similiar yet different circumstances, and it is nice to see them around the NICU and know a little bit of their stories so that we are not all strangers.

Holding our Baby Girl Some More

We are happy to report that Farrah has been breathing just good enough to stay on the nasal cannula and has not needed to go back on the vent. She was borderline two nights ago, and Ray and I called her nurse to check in every few hours to see how she was doing. It all came down to what the blood gas looked like the next morning. At 5 am, we received a call from the hospital and it was Farrah's nurse letting us know that the blood gas test results were better than the day before. Ray and I were so happy to hear the news, which meant that she did not need to go back on the vent that day.

Our visits to the NICU have been getting longer, as we have been able to hold Farrah the past few days. Today, her nurse said that it might be better to let Farrah rest. Soon after she said that, Farrah's incubator started acting up and her nurse said that we would be able to hold her after all because she needed to get a new bed for Farrah. Ray held her for the majority of the time while I pumped. I got to hold her a little bit before the NICU was closed to family members due to a surgery being performed. It is important for preemies to be wrapped in blankets to keep warm when they are not in their beds. Her nurse today gave her a purple beanie to keep her head warm. She looks so cute in it!

Breathing

Farrah's little body has been working so hard to keep up with the nasal cannula the past two days. Today's day and night nurse said that they had to bump up the pressure from the machine based on the blood gas results over the course of the day. She is also breathing very quickly. They are watching to see if she tires out too much. We are praying that her body can adjust to the change and stay strong, but they have warned us tonight not to be surprised if she is back on the ventilator tomorrow. Please pray for her strength and for our good spirits.

Some positive news is that she is currently up to 4 ccs of breast milk every three hours, so her feedings have been going well. She also had another bowel movement today, which shows that her digestive system is still working as it should.

Ray holding Farrah for the first time

Ray held Farrah for the first time yesterday. I have posted a few photos of that wonderful time below. The last photo includes Ray's sister, Jessi.

Farrah seems to be handling the change to the nasal cannula ok. Her oxygen levels still need to be set fairly high, but the nurses assure us that it is common for that to occur when the changes are made. Farrah's feeding were increased from 1 cc every three hours to 3 ccs every three hours since she has been tolerating her feedings ok. Her blood sugar numbers have been a little elevated at certain points during the day. The nurses will adjust her IV nutrition based on blood test results. It is interesting to see that they mix a certain nutritional IV supplement based on exactly what Farrah needs each day hoping to control all of her electrolyte numbers, blood sugar, etc.

During a baby's NICU stay, it is recommended that parents identify a few nurses that they would like to have as "primary" nurses. These nurses will be assigned to the babies as their schedule permits and will follow the babies throughout this NICU stay. We have been advised to identify four primary nurses that we would like to work with: a weekday day-time primary nurse, weekday night time primary nurse, weekend day time primary nurse, and weekend night time primary nurse. We felt very comfortable with yesterday's day time nurse, April, and loved how she handled Farrah and encouraged kangaroo care. We asked her if she would be willing to be Farrah's primacy nurse during the days when she works. She said that she is finishing up with another patient who should be discharged within the next week or two, and after that, she would love to be one of Farrah's primary nurses. We are carefully considering what other nurses to talk to about becoming primary nurses.

I've added a few more recent photos of Farrah below.

Ventilation tube removed

Yesterday morning, Farrah's blood gas numbers looked better than the day before so the decision was made to extubate her. They put the nasal cannula in after removing the ventilation tube, and Farrah has now had it in for over 24 hours. She seemed to be tolerating it ok. She looked very tired when we saw her yesterday, but her eyes were open and she was looking around when we were changing her diaper, wiping her mouth and eyes, and taking her temperature. The nurse needed to increase the amount of oxygen she receives, which is typical with this type of change. As of this morning, her nurse observed that Farrah was breathing pretty fast, but they did another blood gas test this morning an it looked the same as yesterday. That means that they will continue to keep the nasal cannula in, which is a good step towards Farrah breathing on her own.

When Ray and I visited with her yesterday, we could hear a faint squeak coming from Farrah as she was crying. The nurse said that the squeaking is a good sign. Her vocal cords are most likely swollen from having the ventilation tube in for two weeks, so it will take a little time for the swelling to go down. Then we should be able to hear her cry. We look forward to the day when we were can hear cry since we only heard her cry once right after she was delivered, and it was music to our ears.

The photo below shows how Farrah's feedings work. She receives breast milk from a syringe that is lifted above her feeding tube (orange tube), which lets gravity do the work for her feedings. Since she is usually awake during her feedings, she tends to move around and show her fiesty side (as can be seen below).

We will try to update the shutterfly site with more photos and videos shortly.

Update after Blood Transfusion

Farrah's blood transfusion on Thursday went smoothly and she had quite a bit of weight gain afterwards, as is expected after receiving blood. She is holding her weight at over two pounds, which we are thrilled about. They have been giving her a diuretic to make sure that she does not retain too much extra fluid, and her urine output has been good. When they did Farrah's labs on Friday, her blood gas numbers were good but not great, so the NICU doctor decided to wait on trying to remove her breathing tube until today (Saturday). The doctor wanted to wean her oxygen on the ventilation tube and see how she does. We honestly don't understand how all this works, and hopefully today's day nurse can help us understand it better. They are going to do another blood gas test at 8 am and see if it has improved at all. If it has improved, the plan is to remove her breathing tube and replace it with a less invasive nasal cannula. We pray that her lungs are strong enough to adjust to this change. When I called her nurse this morning, she said that Farrah needed to go up on her oxygen this morning, so I will be interested to hear what the NICU doctor has to say when we go over there later. Ray's sister is visiting right now, and she loved meeting her niece yesterday. She will be here through Sunday night.

Good news - we went to my 2-week incision check up at the OB office, and the resident that followed me in the hospital met with us and said that the incision site is looking great. I can start driving again, and she is very encouraged by the progress I have been making in terms of my energy level. She also wanted to know how Farrah is doing and we were happy to show her some photos, including the one where I got to hold her for the first time. I will meet with her again one week before I am scheduled to go back to work in August.

When I am up in the middle of the night pumping, I often search online for references to preemies and the NICU journey. I came across a series by Pampers called "Love Comes Early" that follows a few different families through their NICU journey. One family's story in particular stood out to me. Their baby girl was born at 25 weeks. Her mother had hodgkins lymphoma in 2002 and pulled through it and later had a baby boy who is now 3 years old. The mother reflects on being sick before and now having a premature baby and says "I honestly feel like strong people sometimes are given really hard tasks, and somehow we get through them." Her statement really resonated with me this morning. It is so encouraging to watch stories like her family's and to know that Farrah will be home with us one day and all of this will be a distant memory and she grows and moves on with her life.

Even though Farrah has a PICC line in her arm, blood transfusions cannot go through them, so she needed to get a separate IV. The nurse could not get an IV into her arm, so they needed to put the IV in her head. We were told that this is common for NICU babies even if it looks a little scary. The photo below shows the blood going into Farrah's IV. Ray has pointed out that both his wife and now his daughter are blood recipients and it is important to him to start donating blood regularly. For those who don't know, I am a huge advocate of blood donation and work with local blood banks to get the word out about the importance of blood donation. When I was sick 10+ years ago, I received a whopping 987 units of blood products during my three month hospital stay. What I want is to do what I can to ensure that the blood is there for others when they need it, just like Farrah did.



On Thursday night, my book club suprised me with a potluck celebration at our monthly meeting. Ray was in on the surprise and did not give anything away. It is so nice to have such a great group of local friends who are supporting us through everything we are going through. We got to take home all the leftovers too! They are taking turns providing meals to us, which are helping out tremendously. We received some gifts at the potluck, including a pink teddy bear (my first teddy) that has been added to Farrah's bed. It feels so good to know that the bear is there representing all the love and support coming from that group.

Thank you for the continued emails, texts, letters, packages, and phone calls reminding us that you are all out there thinking of us, praying for us, and supporting us! It means more to us than we could ever express.

Non-emergent blood transfusion

Farrah received a blood transfusion today. Apparently, this is par for the course for preemie babies because the babies have blood drawn every day for tests and cannot create enough new blood. We found out that Farrah's blood type is A+  - just like her mom. Many of you know that I received many (this is a major understatement) blood transfusions when I was sick 10+ years ago, so the news that Farrah needed blood did not phase us. We are very familiar and confident with how carefully all the blood is tested before being given to any individual. Adults typically receive benadryl in an attempt to curb any allergic reactions. Babies do not have allergic reactions, according to the NICU doctors, and no benadryl is necessary. The clinic manager in the NICU stopped by before Farrah's transfusion to check in with us, and she said that there are very few babies who go through the NICU without needing blood transfusions.

One of Farrah's doctor's told us that they are going to try to start weaning her off the oxygen. Their first step in doing this is to switch from the ventilation tube to a nasal cannula. Some babies cannot make this change for quite some time. Please join us in praying that Farrah's body can adjust to the nasal cannula tomorrow. They plan on making the change some time in the morning if everything is going ok for Farrah.

Farrah's urine output is back to what it should be after receiving the medication for the PDA and we were just told that she had another poop without needing a suppository. We're glad to hear that things are working the way that they should.

Holding our Baby Girl

After a full day of running errands and a long wait for my nephrology appointment, Ray and I quickly made our way home to be greeted by the delicious smell of posole cooking away in the crock pot. Thanks to our friend Mary, we did not even have to think about what to make for dinner. When we moved to Arizona, I found out about a local book club through craigslist. It has been so wonderful being part of such a special group of people, and they have all been so supportive during the past month. The book club has organized a dinner schedule where several of the members are dropping off meals to us. It makes it so much easier for us to not have to even think about what to make or eat for dinner. Many, many thanks to all of them!

After eating our dinner, Ray and I headed over to the hospital. We heard earlier in the day that the echo looked good and there was no PDA seen. I should say that with babies as small as Farrah, it is possible for there still to be a murmur and for the PDA to return. We will continue to pray that it will be closed and will not be an issue for Farrah. Now that her echo results looked ok, they are resuming Farrah's feeding. She is only receiving 1 cc of breast milk every three or four hours. We arrived in time for Farrah's 8 pm rounds. I took her temperature and Ray changed her diaper and wiped her mouth and eyes with a moistening cloth. We were happy to see more color added to Farrah's bed linens since she was switched from a humidity bed to an isolet. Ray held up Farrah's ventilation tube while her night nurse moved her to a different position.

Farrah slept right through her diaper change and was getting fed through her

feeding tube when this picture was taken. We thought it was so cute how her legs

were crossed like a pretzel.

At that point, the night nurse asked us if we wanted to hold Farrah. We couldn't believe that it was an option so soon, and Ray and I said that as long as they thought it would be ok, we would love to. Her nurse told us that she seemed stable enough and explained to us that Farrah's oxygen may desaturate since it would be a big change for her. If that happened, they would move her back to her bed. Kangaroo care, which is skin-to-skin contact, is highly encouraged in the NICU. Farrah's nurse and a respiratory therapist worked together to move Farrah out of her bed and into my arms. Her head went against my chest and she was swaddled in a blanket. Rather than having her oxygen drop, Farrah's oxygen went up and they needed to turn down the oxygen support. Her heartrate stayed stable the entire time. She responded so well to being held by me. I sat in the rocking chair and held my sweet baby girl for 45 minutes while talking and singing to her. It was amazing! Next time we come in, Ray needs to wear a button down shirt so he can hold her the same way.

Echo results

The echo showed zero PDA after Farrah received the medication. We have been running errands together today - picking up Farrah's birth certificate and are currently waiting for my nephrology appointment. We can't wait to see Farrah today! We are bringing her a new pink blanket now that she can have more items in her isolet.

Weight Gain

Ray's mom flew back to the Bay Area early this morning. We had a very nice visit with her. Ray and I both dropped her off at the airport and then drove to the hospital for a quick visit with Farrah since we were already more than halfway there. We came home afterwards and took a long nap. I am still making sure to rest right now and hope to get clearance to drive again after my follow up at the OB office on Friday. I also have a follow up nephrology appointment tomorrow and hope that it will go well. I decided to switch nephrologists after my hospitalization because the team that followed me seemed very interested in my history and interested in doing more diagnostic tests to see if they could identify any other reason for my blood pressure issues. It will be a bit of a transition to be seen by a new team, but I think it is for the better.

Tonight we found out that Farrah hit the two pound mark! It is still possible that her weight will dip below again, but we are so happy that she has had a steady weight gain despite not getting breast milk for the past few days. We also hope that it is true weight gain and that she is not retaining that much fluid.

They did an echo of her heart today to see if the PDA issue is gone, and we should hear the results tomorrow. The night nurse and day nurse told us that they could no longer hear a murmur, so hopefully that means that it has closed.

Farrah was very alert during yesterday evening's diaper change. See photo below.

Lots of Sleep

Farrah has been sleeping when we have visited her the last two days. The nurses wake her briefly to change her diaper, check her temperature, and move her position, but otherwise, we have been letting her rest. She has been cuddling with her blanket while she sleeps. This leads us to believe that she is comfortable and is getting the rest that she needs.

They are going to do another echo on Tuesday instead of Monday to see if the medication is helping to close her PDA. Her weight has stayed steady and we still expect that it might drop a little while she is not receiving breast milk. So far, it hasn't dropped. They moved her to a different area in the NICU because they are consolidating the "pods" where the babies are kept. One nurse told us that they are planning to move the entire NICU to another floor this summer. That sounds like quite an undertaking to us, but they must have good project management in place to do something like that.

As for Ray and I, we are starting to get more sleep too. My pumping schedule usually leads me to wake up twice in the night and I sometimes call to check on Farrah and eat a snack/meal depending on how hungry I am. It took a few days to realize that I need to take mid-day naps when waking up so much at night. The naps have helped me feel more energetic during the day.

Below is a photo of Farrah resting comfortably yesterday.

PDA

The results from yesterday's echo showed that Farrah has a large PDA. They started giving her a medication that should help to resolve this issue. We will know by Monday night if the medication is working. The nurses say that Farrah has been handling it all in stride. We have said from the get-go, she is small but mighty. Ray and I did a little research about PDA and learned that it is very common for preemies and that the medication usually does the trick. The doctor we met with told us that he earlier they administer the medication, the better. At 8 days old, they said it was a good age to administer the medication to her.

When we visited her last night, her nurse had woken her up to change her diaper and take her temperature one hour before, so Farrah was sleeping peacefully while we visited. She briefly opened her eyes when we said hello and then went back to sleep. The nurse said that she was still feisty when awake, moving her arms and legs all around, which is what they like to see. Before we left, Ray and I rested our hands on Farrah and prayed for our daughter. By taking each day at it comes, we hope that we can avoid worrying about something that isn't there and will be able to deal with whatever comes our way.

We consolidated our photos and videos to one website and will continue to update them. Please visit http://farrahjoy.shutterfly.com/ to see photos and videos of Farrah. We will continue with this blog, as we have found that it is helpful for us to process what is going on and have heard from others that it is helpful for them to know what to pray for and how they can support us.

Something new

We are planning to go see Farrah this evening, which gives Ray and his mom some time to run errands and work on the house a bit. I called Farrah's nurse to check in and found out that her breathing tube somehow was dislodged so they needed to put a new one in place. They got a new one in on their first attempt and Farrah did not seem to be negatively affected by the procedure. They will confirm the placement with an x-ray shortly, but it appears to be working correctly. Farrah is on 23-24% oxygen, which is close to breathing on her own.

We were told today that they have been hearing a heart murmur when they listen to Farrah's heart during the past 12 hours. They suspect that she has a common preemie condition known as PDA (patent ductus arteriosus). They performed an echo to confirm if she has this condition or not, and the results of the echo should be back tonight before our visit there. If she does have PDA, they will need to give her a series of medications and during that time she cannot receive food other than IV nutrition. That means she might not get breast milk for 2-3 days. They will also need to closely monitor her urine output since the medication can impact their kidney function.

We would be relieved to learn that the murmur is not PDA and that the issue has resolved on its own, and we pray for that today. If it is PDA, we ask for prayers for strength in taking in the new information and continued protection of Farrah's little body. We know that the NICU journey is usually filled with ups and downs, and we are blessed that things have been ok thus far.

Thankful for the basics

As of yesterday, Farrah is receiving breast milk via her feeding tube every three hours. She has also grown to more than 800 grams. She is on very little oxygen support and is breathing 95% on her own. She has been pooping more after receiving a suppository, which we are all happy to see. It is funny how encouraging all the basic functions are to us at this point. We picked up Ray's mom from the airport yesterday and drove to the hospital. When we arrived, the NICU was closed due to a surgery taking place. NICU babies are too unstable to move to the OR, so all surgeries take place within the NICU. When that happens, the NICU is closed to parents and visitors to create a more sterile environment. Ray's mom loved meeting her little granddaughter and she was there while the rounds were taking place, which meant she got to see Ray change Farrah's diaper (his first poopy one) and take her temperature. While they visited with her, I went to the pumping room. Farrah's nurse told us that she has been working in the NICU for more than 35 years. It is so comforting to know the level of experience that some of her nurses have. While other nurses have less experience, they make up for it in proving incredible around-the-clock care. They removed the phototherapy lights since Farrah's bilirubin numbers looked ok. She will only go back under the lights if the levels go up. Ray and I both can tell that she is more comfortable these days than she was in the beginning. She appears to sleep more peacefully too. Yesterday marked one week since Farrah's arrival. We are so thankful that she is growing and that her body continues to develop outside of the womb.

First Family Photo

We spent some time at the hospital tonight with Farrah. I took her temperature and changed her diaper and we were pleased to see her first poop (meconium). It was a quiet evening together and we realized that we had not taken a photo of the three of us, so her nurse took the photo below.

They were able to downgrade the type of ventilation she needs today and her blood gas levels were looking good. We are happy with slow and steady progress and pray that she has a restful and quiet night.

Our New Normal

Even though there haven't been any posts for a few days, lots of good things have been happening lately. We intend to update on here much more regularly now that I am home. 

- I finally got to go home on Tuesday, July 10th.
- Farrah is being cared for and carefully monitored in the NICU by an incredible team of nurses and doctors.
- My dad stayed with us a little longer and left for home on a early flight this morning. He got to spend even more time with his granddaughter.
- Ray's mom is coming to town tomorrow to spend a long weekend with us and then Ray's sister is planning to come to town next week.
- My mom will probably be back for another visit before the end of the month.

We are so thankful for such a wonderful support network of family and friends. Ray and I are continuing on with our mantra of "one day at a time." We know that we are not in control and we are leaning on our faith and putting our trust in God that he will continue to protect little Farrah in the days, weeks, and months ahead. We are so thankful for each day with our little miracle baby.

Farrah is doing ok in the NICU. Her weight has been going up and down, as is to be expected, and the doctors are trying to slowly wean her from the oscillating ventilator that she's been on the past few days. They monitor her blood gas levels through regular blood tests, which lets the doctors know how much extra help she needs from the ventilator. She had a feeding tube inserted, but she threw up the first feeding of breast milk they gave her the other day, so they will try again soon. We signed in authorization for them to put a PICC line (more permanent IV) into her and that procedure will probably be done within the next week. They like to have them on as little ventilator support as possible before putting in the PICC line. There are infection risks with the PICC line, so we just pray that her little body will stay strong. We have been told time and time again that the NICU journey is often one step forward, two steps back. We are staying optimistic and doing our best to take each day as it comes.

The nurses say that Farrah is "feisty" and that she moves a lot for baby so small. As I said before, she is a little spitfire. :) She seems calmer these days, which means that she is feeling better and hopefully isn't having to work as hard to breathe. We were told that it might only be another week or so until we can hold Farrah. What an amazing moment that will be!

In terms of prayer requests for our little girl, she still has a long way to go. Here are some of the big things we are praying for:
- That her lungs will continue to develop so she can breathe on her own
- That she will be able to keep her food down and no longer need the IV nutrition
- That once she feeds, her digestive system will be working as it should (as one nurse put it to us - "pray for poop".)
- That everything goes smoothly with her PICC line insertion
- That her little body stays strong and she avoids any infection

7/11/12 Update
We made it to the hospital during the rounds yesterday, and Ray got to change Farrah's diaper and take her temperature by putting the thermometer under her arm. I removed the covering from Farrah's eyes, which is all part of the assessment that takes place every four hours. She opened up her eyes and moved her arms and legs at that time. We needed to cover her with our hands to keep her from moving too much so that she would stay calm. She weighed in at 711 grams and the doctor pointed out that the date was 7/11. When we called Farrah's night nurse, she said that she had gained some more weight over the course of the day and weighed in at 800 grams. We love spending time with our sweet baby girl.

I had posted four photos on facebook earlier this week and decided to re-post them here for anyone who missed them. There are new photos below those.

Ray "swaddling" Farrah to calm her down.

Ray's hands holding Farrah's hands

Farrah's bilirubin levels have been a little high, so they have been putting

her under phototherapy lights. It looks like she is sun bathing with her little mask on.

Farrah's first pacifier on 7/9/12. At first she wasn't sure

about it, then she began sucking on it.

Ray's finger and Farrah's foot

Grandpa touching Farrah's head

No Wi-fi

We have not been able to update as regularly as usual because the postpartum unit does not have wi-fi. Rest assured, we are taking photos of our sweet daughter Farrah that we look forward to sharing as soon as possible. I may be discharged tomorrow, July 10 as long as my blood pressure behaves.

Introducing....

Farrah Joy

Baby M has a name! We were so blessed to have Farrah come into the world at 9:11 pm on Friday, July 6th. She was quickly rushed off to the NICU for assessment. We could hear her crying within two minutes after delivery. Her apgar scores were 6 and the 9, which is way better than what her mommy's scores were after a full-term birth. There is one NICU nurse assigned to two babies at a time, so Farrah is receiving excellent care and monitoring. Parents are allowed to visit their babies in the NICU at any time of day. Ray went back with her to the NICU as my ceasarean section was wrapped up. Farrah was able to breath on her own at birth and then they decided to put her on mechanical ventilation to help her. As of Saturday night at 9 pm, they were weaning her off the mechanical ventilation and were going to see how she did on her blood gas tests. The NICU world is new to us, so we will do our best to breakdown the technical descriptions and know-how as we become more familiar with it all.

Ray spent the night of delivery on the cot in my hospital room while my dad went back to our house. Ray was wiped out from everything and slept through the night despite all the monitoring and doctors' visits I received. I couldn't sleep for the life of me due to excitement, and when my nurse came to check on me at 3 am, she asked if I could bend my legs as the anesthesia wore off. If so, we could take a wheelchair ride to the nursery so I could meet Farrah. It was quite an ordeal getting me out of bed and into a wheelchair, but I was so eager to meet our baby girl. They wanted to keep me on magnesium sulfate for the first 24 hours after delivery as a precaution, so I was a bit lightheaded as we went over to the NICU. My night nurse said that it might be hard for me to see our baby in the incubator and to see her true size, but I was still so happy to see her.  She has ten fingers and ten toes, and as soon as we came over to her and I spoke to her, she opened her eyes and started moving all around. So that's what all those kicks, punches, and movements looked like inside of me. It appeared that she recognized my voice and her nurse said that it would be fine for me to reach inside her incubator and touch her. She responded to my touch by moving some more. We like to say that she is small, but mighty. All the prayers and support from everyone has carried us through the unknowns of the past three weeks and we trust that God will continue to protect her tiny body as the prayers and support continue.

Later on Saturday, my Aunt Laura visited Ray and me, and I took her back to meet Farrah. At that time, Farrah was trying to pull on the ventilator tube and was moving her arms and kicking. She has a little jaundice and will be placed under the phototherapy light with a little mask around her eyes. It looks like the little babies are sun tanning when this happens. Farrah's nurse told us that she is doing very well and they want to see how soon they can get her breathing on her own. We went back to see Farrah later on Saturday night when we introduced her to my dad, her grandpa. We didn't get a photo of  them together and will plan to before he leaves to go back home. Saturday night was also the first time that Ray and I were together in the NICU with Farrah. They were removing the ventilation tube during that time and Farrah seemed to be ok with less support for breathing. She also moved more when she heard our voices. My dad took the first family photo of the three of us, and we will upload that picture from his camera as soon as possible. They are keeping Farrah's incubator humid right now to give her an environment that is as close to what she was used to in utero as possible. At this point, she cannot have any blankets or toys in the incubator other than what the NICU uses. Eventually, we will be able to bring in toys for her.

I uploaded a few photos from July 7th. The first is of Farrah holding my finger and the second is to show her size next to my hand.

We were very happy to learn that it was possible for me to breast feed, despite all the blood pressure medications that I am on. They are all considered to be safe for a baby. When a baby is born so early,  a mom's body is not ready to breastfeed immediately, so I have been pumping every three hours or so to establish my milk supply. A lactation specialist came in to teach me how to pump on Saturday. My nurses are taking the colostrum from me and are putting it in the freezer in the NICU. The NICU nurses will give Farrah tastes of the colostrum in order to get her used to the concept and taste of feeding. I have been told that as I continue to pump several times a day, my milk will come in. We think that she is going to be a good eater, as she couldn't stop moving after I ate throughout the pregnancy.

The NICU doctors have told us that Farrah most likely won't be able to go home with us until two weeks before her delivery date, which would put her homecoming around mid-September. It is possible that she could come home sooner or later depending on how well she does in the NICU. I am currently still in the perinatal high risk unit due to the amount of monitoring I need as we see what my blood pressures do post-delivery. The magnesium sulfate kept my blood pressure low yesterday and then stopped infusing the mag late on Saturday night. We have been told that I will most likely be in the hospital for 4-5 days after delivery. I was able to walk a little yesterday before getting into the wheelchair to go see Farrah. They are able to control my pain with oral medications and so far, my recovery has been steady. My nurses want me to start walking more each day as I recover.

Ray's mom is scheduled to fly into town next Friday and will be staying with us for a long weekend. She has yet to see our house and is so excited to meet her first grandchild. Ray's sister may join her, but she has a pretty busy work schedule next week. My dad has been so helpful with running errands for us and helping to prepare the house for my homecoming. He and my Uncle Ed spent all day Saturday painting. They didn't wrap up until early evening and they plan to keep painting today (Sunday). Thank you so much dad and Uncle Ed! It has been wonderful having my dad in town, especially having him here with us when we were told that THE day for delivery had come. We are so blessed to have such an amazingly supportive family and incredible friends.

The offical results are in...

Little Miss Baby M was born on July 6th at 9:11 PM.  She weighs 1 pound, 12 oz and is 13 1/2" long.  Yes, she is small but she is also very cute.  Meghan is resting comfortably and Ray is calming down.  A restful night is hopefully ahead for the entire Masterson family. 

It's A Girl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   July 6, about 9:15 PM, Little Miss Baby M is welcomed to the world...Meghan is doing well.  Ray has escorted the baby girl to the NICU unit which will be her home for a while.  More news in a while.

BABY IS COMING

Today is the day!!!!  Doctor's have determined that the baby girl will be born today.  Meghan has left her room, heading to delivery.  This is Al, Meghan's dad.  Ray has gone in with Meghan and will be assisting the doctors.   Nahh, only kidding.

Keep the prayers and good wishes coming...more to follow.

No News is Good News

No post last night because...I ended up going to sleep on time and sleeping through the night! It was uneventful and uninteruptted, and I feel so much better today.

My dad, Ray, and I made it outside on Wednesday just in time to see the downtown fireworks. It was a great show! Ray said how fun it will be next year when we can watch it with Baby M. We went up to the roof of the hospital parking garage and then got locked out when we tried to get back in the building and needed a security guard to let us in. Whenever I go on a wheel chair ride with out a nurse, they give us a 30 minute limit. The first time we went a little over the time, Ray got a call on his cell phone to check up on us even though we were only downstairs in the cafeteria.

On Wednesday night, my blood pressure was a little too high at bedtime, so they gave me an IV med that brought it back down fairly quickly but the excitement of all the extra monitoring kept me up until 1 am. Then they did a blood draw at 4 am. Needless to say, I didn't get much sleep that night.

I slept in and then called my dad and told him to take his time coming over here. He was going to run some errands to help us with house stuff and then also ended up getting the oil changed in our car. Thanks dad! The morning ultrasound looked ok according to my doctors and they said that we'll just keep going until they decide otherwise. The results from my 4 am lab test also looked good - the kidney numbers are holding, the liver number is holding, and the doctors said that nothing out of the ordinary showed up.

Remember my neighbor who was admitted the same day as me? Well, she had friends and family over to her room on July 4th for a little party, then I heard later that night from my nurse that she was about to have a c section. It was not a planned c section, and something changed quickly for her or the baby that necessitated it then and there. It was a reminder that things change all the time in this situation and how any day can be THE day when the say it is time to deliver. I gave Baby M a pep talk about how excited daddy and I are to meet her but how we'd like her to stay in as long as possible. She responded by continuing to "look good on the monitor" according to my nurses and moving all around inside. Now that we've made it to the beginning of 28 weeks today (yippeee!), our plan is to just keep on going.  :)

In terms of specific prayer requests, there are a few specific things we would love prayers for:

- One week ago, Ray learned that his temp-to-perm job was ending today. When hired on as a contractor, he was told that he would be replacing an employee who was out on long term disability and would not be returning. His manager was surprised to learn last week, that the employee was returning, which meant that Ray would no longer be needed. Ray has been actively looking for other job opportunities, but this news threw us both for a loop since we were really hoping that he would be hired on there full-time this summer. We are trusting that there is an even better opportunity out there for him, but it is still unnerving for him to be unemployed while so much is going on with me and Baby M.

- The doctors are carefully watching the ultrasound results. They want to see increased blood flow from the placenta and umbilical cord and they want assurance that all the arteries they are watching are doing exactly what they should. Blood flow also impacts how quickly babies grow, so any limitation in blood flow most likely will delay growth. There is way more technical mumbo jumbo that we don't completely understand, but we pray that they keep seeing what they want to see as long as possible.

- The doctors are also carefully watching what the baby's heartrate is doing. They are encouraged when they see accelerations and very few decelerations. We pray every day that her heartrate stays strong and steady and she lets the doctors know that she is content being inside a little longer.

- My body seems to be holding up with everything and we just pray that it continues to remain strong until delivery.

- Our next goal is to get to 30 weeks to give Baby M more time for growth and development. We believe that she is still under 2 pounds and we hope that we can at least get her over the 2 pound mark before delivery.

Thank you so much for encouraging us and praying for us!

Happy 4th!

Happy 4th everyone! Hopefully you and yours are doing something fun today. We are celebrating this holiday with tons of thanks that Baby M is still doing great inside and is getting closer to 28 weeks. We are thankful that I feel as well as I do and that I have been able to good a decent night's sleep lately along with naps during the days. We are thankful for the caring doctors and nurses here. We pray every day that Baby M will have more time to cook so that she can be stronger and healthier whenever it is her time to enter the world. We have been told again and again by the doctors that we won't make it to full term, and we appreciate every extra day we can get.

Yesterday, I met with two women from physical therapy and occupational therapy. My doctor ordered the consult per my request to exercise a bit in bed if they will not allow me to walk. The physical therapist gave me several different exercises to do twice a day. She will come by a few times per week to check in my progress. When I was in the hospital 10 years ago, I saw how quickly muscle atrophy can take place when I was stuck in a hospital bed and I want to try to maintain a little more strength this time around. To be careful, the physical therapist took my blood pressure before and after the exercises, and there was no drastic change.

To see how other women have handled hospital bed rest during pregnancy, I googled "how to survive hospital bed rest" and came up with all sorts of links. One link that was particularly interesting was from a woman who was having triplets and was on hospital bed rest for 100 days. She created a survival guide and some of the main points that stood out were how she had goals (however small) to reach for and she had a routine. Granted, in a hospital environment it is very hard to know who will be coming in your room, when each procedure will be happening, etc. It sounded like she took control in the areas where she could - what she ate, when she showered, and when she had visitors. She also worked towards goals for her and her triplets. In pregnancy, there are certain milestones for a baby's development. The first is 24 weeks, which is viability. The next is 28 weeks, then 30 weeks, then 32 weeks. We have to remind ourselves that we got to the hospital in time at 25 weeks and we are almost to the next milestone of 28 weeks. My doctors goal is to get me to 28 weeks (this Friday), but if the baby looks ok and I look ok, then they said we will keep going.

We have had bumps in the road, but all in all, we are on a good path. Baby M is almost three weeks past where she was when I was transported here via helicopter and told that delivery was likely. The interesting thing that I learned from my nurse last might is that the gal in the room next to mine (whom I refer to as my neighbor since we share a bathroom) has been here just as long as me. We were admitted the same day. Apparently, she is being monitored the same way I am, gets the same daily ultrasounds, and has the same dietary restrictions. My nurse suggests that we meet because we are both going through something so similar. There may be a way for us to meet, but we'll need to let the nurses arrange that since we are both tied down to our beds a.k.a strapped to monitors.

My dad flew into town this morning and Ray picked him up at the airport and then they drove straight to the hospital. My dad was able to watch the BPP and doppler ultrasounds and get a good explantion about everything from the ultrasound tech and then we got a wheelchair pass so I could eat lunch with them in the cafeteria. To keep with the theme of the holiday, we all ordered some type of bbq dish. We came back to my room and then I took a nap while they went back to the house. They will be here tonight and hopefully it will be clear enough for us to go up to the roof to watch downtown fireworks. Apparently, there are now three of us in the high risk unit who have preeclampsia issues. The third gal was flown in from Chandler Regional last night. Sound familiar?

I'm not sure why I can't get the photo below to be right-side-up, but it is a photo of the view from my room. It's a lot better than the pipes, right? We moved my bed today so that I can see out the window all the time. The sun is setting right now, and it is beautiful.

Quick update

We had a scare tonight with Baby M. I was sitting up in bed talking on the phone around 11 pm when my nurse comes in and tells me to lay on my side. She then put the oxygen mask on me and had another nurse page the resident. Apparently, she saw Baby M's heartbeat take a dive and what she did with me is standard protocol when that happens. My nurse explained that the heart rate can drop for a number of reasons including the baby stepping on the umbilical cord and temporarily cutting off blood supply. The resident came in and said that it looked like the heartbeat was going right back to normal and that they wanted to give me IV fluid just in case there was any dehydration. They hooked me up to the IV for 30 minutes. Things seem ok now and hopefully it is an uneventful night. We are eager to meet our little girl, but we are fine with waiting for her arrival a little while longer. We are clearly being monitored 24/7 and I am so thankful for how closely they are watching us. When they wake me up in the middle of the night for a blood draw, I am not quite as thankful. My dad is coming into town tomorrow on July 4th and will be here through the weekend. We are excited to have him here to see our house and visit with us.

What's Cooking

We have started realizing just how many people are reading this blog, and we thank you all for taking the time to follow our journey and encourage us and pray for us. Thank you for cards and care packages you've sent, emails, calls, and texts! Even if we don't respond, we read everything you send. It helps us a lot to know that we are not alone in this. We have some good news to share: - The latest 24 hour collection showed a drop in my protein levels. This doesn't change the course of treatment, but it is considered to be good news that there was no increase in the last week. - Baby M passed her BPP ultrasound today in only 5 minutes. They saw her hicupping, which counts for breathing and she also had lots of movement. All this without chocolate milk. The ultrasound tech and I had a theory that it I drank chocolate milk beforehand, it would help Baby M pass. Due to my new diet restrictions, I can't drink as much chocolate milk. - Baby M continues to be very active; the nurses are constantly coming in to adjust the monitor because she somehow sneaks away from it. Her favorite spot at night time while I am sleeping appears to be on either side of my pelvis. I know just where to find her if a new night nurse has any trouble. - A nutritionist came to my room tonight for a consult about my new diabetic diet and renal diet, and I am feeling much more comfortable with ordering food here and what changes I need to make to my food choices. She listened to my concerns about the food and decided to open up the cafeteria menu to me so my food options aren't so limited. I ordered my first meal from the cafeteria tonight, and it was delicious. Now I can see why Ray likes to eat at the cafeteria here. Speaking of Ray, he has so much on his plate right now and is working so hard to do everything to fill in the gaps here at the hospital, at our house, with our bills, with our two cats, at work, etc. I know he would appreciate hearing from some of you directly. You can email him at our gmail account - raymegmasterson@gmail.com.

It is what it is

The doctors are still tweaking my blood pressure meds to provide the best coverage since we still have some dips and some spikes, but nothing like the other night. The three-hour glucose test occurred this morning without any issues, but it confirmed that I have gestational diabetes. I guess my body is just reacting in all sorts of ways to being pregnant. My nurses say that it has nothing to do with my diet since, in Ray's words, I "don't sit around eating candy bars all day" and actually eat pretty healthy food on a regular basis. So this adds a new complication to the mix. I don't feel like I have much to work with in term of hospital food, so we are researching some options of bringing in more food from outside. My nurses will start monitoing my glucose four times a day and we will definitely be altering my diet. I'll be meeting with someone tomorrow for a diabetes consult as well meeting with a nutritionist to review my recommended diet for diabetes and kidney issues. This new diagnosis has thrown us a curve ball, but as my Grandpa used to say, "it is what it is."


After a two hour ultrasound today, my nurse decided that it would be a good day to take me around the hospital in a wheelchair. She realized that I hadn't been outside in more than two weeks and have barely left the floor that my room is on, so it was time to get out. We went all around the courtyard outside, through the lobby, checked out the gift shop and the large fish tank, traveled around different parts of the hospital and then back to my floor. At the gift shop, I was able to pick up a card for Ray since it's our 6th anniversary next Sunday. I figured that might be my only chance to pick something out myself.


I posted the view from my first room below. Pretty exciting pipes, right? I hope to get a shot of my new view soon, which is much improved.